Principle: I am always and forever a beginner, walking in the Divine Mystery.
Practice: Be in a practice of releasing what you think you know; it robs you of your capacity to learn.
written 7/8/21
Good morning, Beloveds All: Isis, Sekhmet, Great Mother, Yeshua, Archangel Michael, GP, all guides, angels, wise ones. Thank You for a new day to walk this sacred Earth path with You, as You, through You and in You. I’m being called to meditate...
Post-meditation: I’m definitely experiencing a shift in my guidance for spiritual practice. I no longer feel called to the “deep dives” into journaling, and my daily entries lately have been far shorter as a result. There’s more ego, more “figuring it out” on my own when I’m journaling, even though lately I’ve been very aware of Your Presence in my writing, Beloveds. You’ve often taken me in a direction that was a complete surprise to me.
And still, journaling is familiar, more known territory because I’ve been doing it for most of my life. I believe I have some expertise with it; I believe I know what to expect. It’s well within my comfort zone; even when You surprise me, I have a sense of being in known territory.
And I feel you calling me into more explicit, direct communion with You, like meditation. Even though I’m a long-time meditator, meditation is a leap into You as the Unknown, an invitation to direct communion and Oneness. I feel far more vulnerable with meditation than with journaling; I’m more open, more acknowledging my need for You, Beloveds.
The mantra from my individual silent retreat in 2019 is coming up: “I walk unarmed into the arena of the unknown, desiring only greater honesty and intimacy with You and others.” Since then, it’s evolved into “I walk unarmed into the arena of the Unknown (You as the Divine Unknown, Beloveds), praying only for greater intimacy with You, myself and others.”
And finally, I realized just in the last couple days that I cannot walk “into” the arena of the Unknown because I cannot leave or enter that arena; I am IN Your arena of the great Mystery always. I live and move and have my being in You, because everything is You. And in Your arena, I have no expertise, no experience, I do not know anything; I am always a beginner. This quote from Thomas Merton captures it beautifully:
“One cannot begin to face the real difficulties of the life of prayer and meditation unless one is first perfectly content to be a beginner and really experience himself as one who knows little or nothing, and has a desperate need to learn the bare rudiments. Those who think they “know” from the beginning will never, in fact, come to know anything. We do not want to be beginners. But let us be convinced of the fact that we will never be anything else but beginners, all our life!” (from Contemplative Prayer, by Thomas Merton).
Help me to stay in this freshness, this mystery, this open-heartedness with You. Help me to walk in Your Divine Mystery, as a beginner, Beloveds.
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